Will God Show Up?
I recently spoke to a group of young professional women about the fear of being yourself. Sounds kind of funny but it is a common fear. You would think of all things, we would be comfortable being ourselves but for some reason (or many) we are not.
There are hurts from our past that stop us short of being our true selves. We live in subcultures that have certain expectations of us. There is the fear of being abandoned if we actually lived out according to our true selves. After all, everyone has been rejected at some point or another for being themself.
As I was looking over my manuscript the night before I realized a fear that I carry and did not even know it. The fear of being abandoned. A few years ago I read a story of a young child being abandoned by their parent at a baseball game. Can you even imagine?? I fear that people will abandon me through their death. I fear that God will abandon me by not showing up.
Abandonment can be leaving or not showing up. I fear that if I step out in faith that God will not show up. I fear that as life pressures and struggles mount that God will not show up. In so many ways I doubt that God will show up. Then I remember what I know and believe about God. That in fact God won't show up because God is already there. God's with me, waiting. God doesn't have to show up because God already has. My prayer is that I would grow to trust and believe that God is already with me and he doesn't have to "show up".
There are hurts from our past that stop us short of being our true selves. We live in subcultures that have certain expectations of us. There is the fear of being abandoned if we actually lived out according to our true selves. After all, everyone has been rejected at some point or another for being themself.
As I was looking over my manuscript the night before I realized a fear that I carry and did not even know it. The fear of being abandoned. A few years ago I read a story of a young child being abandoned by their parent at a baseball game. Can you even imagine?? I fear that people will abandon me through their death. I fear that God will abandon me by not showing up.
Abandonment can be leaving or not showing up. I fear that if I step out in faith that God will not show up. I fear that as life pressures and struggles mount that God will not show up. In so many ways I doubt that God will show up. Then I remember what I know and believe about God. That in fact God won't show up because God is already there. God's with me, waiting. God doesn't have to show up because God already has. My prayer is that I would grow to trust and believe that God is already with me and he doesn't have to "show up".
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